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Jan. 19th, 2005 @ 10:45 pm Silence is heard.
During my last therapy session, my therapist snatched my file and let me read my psych report. Those psych reports really are bullshit, you know that? So here's what I have:
Mood Disorder (NOS -not otherwise specified)
Bipolar Disorder (not yet ruled out)
History of drug and/or alcohol abuse

Pretty fascinating, eh?

My therapist is going to give me a whole bunch of quizzes/tests that will narrow down my "mood disorder". It's more for fun than to be taken seriously. We're also going to get ahold of some inkblots and tarot cards. Evidently there's a therapy technique involving tarot cards... how cool is that?

Anyway... I wasn't supposed to ever see that psych report, so shhhh, don't tell no one.
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Don't be sad
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Dec. 28th, 2004 @ 02:44 pm Silence is heard.
My New Year's resolution is going to be no different than it is any other year. Just to get my act together. Same old song. And by February, this will all be a vague memory of when I fooled myself into believing that I can change. So why haven't I changed my resolution? What if I decided that for the year 2005, I wanted to fail at everything and make my life a living hell. That way, when I failed to make the resolution happen, I would be a happier, better person. And anyway, the resolution only counts for the first six months, after which I'll be 21 and nothing but a shot of legal vodka will mean shit. *sigh* Rambling. All of it. Life never changes for anyone, no matter how many times they've been through the wash.
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Runaway
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Dec. 5th, 2004 @ 10:17 pm Fuck Santa.
Feels like: indifferent

MyOwnTabulaRasa: Santa, I want a puppy for xmas
SantaClaus: Hey. You're back. Stretch that window and fire away.

MyOwnTabulaRasa: I want a puppy
SantaClaus: You can always type, 'Tell Santa' and I'll be happy to listen to all of your wishes!

MyOwnTabulaRasa: tell santa
SantaClaus: So this is where you sit on my lap and tell me what you want. We can talk about the serious stuff like shopping after this. So, what is the first thing you would like from Santa this year.

MyOwnTabulaRasa: I said, I want a puppy
SantaClaus: What else is at the top of your list?

MyOwnTabulaRasa: a puppy
SantaClaus: What would your final Christmas wish be?

MyOwnTabulaRasa: puppy
SantaClaus:  O.K. that's plenty for Santa to go on. Why don't you type, "poll" and vote for your favorite holiday song.

MyOwnTabulaRasa: poop
SantaClaus: Hmm, that's a lump of coal for you.

MyOwnTabulaRasa: just one?

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Don't be sad
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Nov. 30th, 2004 @ 02:21 am Silence is heard.
Animal crackers have to be one of the best things to exist in the world today.
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Runaway
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Nov. 28th, 2004 @ 10:34 am Silence is heard.
Feels like: frustrated
I got an academic warning in the mail the other day. I feel as though all odds are against me. I should go to the teacher and ask her what grade I need on the final to pass. But I have a feeling she'll be snotty about it. So I'm not doing that well compared to the rest of the class. But is it my fault that I'm 1 of 4 people that is taking the class for the first time? So maybe, just maybe I'm not catching on as well as everyone else in the class because this isn't my second time around.

Either way I need to work my butt off. It didn't help being sick for the last test. And maybe I should take up religion and pray a little?
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Don't be sad
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Nov. 26th, 2004 @ 01:56 am The tabula rasa of all entries...
Feels like: accomplished
We have to demand more
Not of each other
But more from ourselves
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Runaway
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